your chance has come & gone - Monday, March 23, 2009

SATURDAY: I woke up @ 9, because my mom decided to call my cell, WHEN SHE WAS AT HOME. Doesn't that just make a ton of sense? Well, either way, SHE WOKE ME UP. I got up, and had some breakfast. I thought that we were going to Ikea and got ready...but we didn't! :( Mhmms, I was deff a little upset! So, we all stayed home, watching "Housewives Holiday" off mobtv...WE HAVE FINISHED THE SERIES, hmm what other Singaporean shows can I watch now? Suggestions, anyone? After that, I went to exercise for like...an hour! :) Skipped rope, and ran a whole bunch. Justin & family came over @ night because Samantha and I had to practice singing for church on Sunday, because my mom fell sick! :( We chose "Blessed be your name", we barely practiced, but OH WELL. Then, I came online, and all of a sudden just felt so mad, I honestly don't know why. Possibly because it is my time of month? BAHAHA, okay, don't even bother reading that part. I'm guessing that's why? Then, I just HAD to sign onto friendster and read something, that literally made me go mental. I just thought that they didn't even talk anymore? Apparantly not. Either way, I'm done with that, considering that I spent another night crying til fuckin 2 in the morning. I should've known...definitely SHOULD HAVE KNOWN. I guess, I'm just a little too stupid though, eh? & I thought you guys were my friends...hmm.

INTAKE YESTERDAY?

3 cups of lettuce (RAW) – 30 calories
Ice cream – 150 Calories
1 glass of 1% milk – 102 calories
Special K cereal – 150 Calories
Thinsations – 100 Calories
Apple – 81 Calories
Orange – 59 Calories

Brocolli & Fish - approx. 300? :(

OUTAKE?

30 mins of intense skipping rope – 200 Calories BURNED.
30 mins of running – 200 calories BURNED

=652 calories, EW.

TODAY; I woke up, and was in such a bitchy mood...my reasons have already been mentioned! :) I was up at 8.30, and church didn't even start til 11, ugghs. We were EARLY, a SERIOUS surprise. I absolutely loved the worship, it was incredibly lively and all that! We had a great sermon, AN ADULTEROUS HEART! Bahahas, no it's not the topic that I like, sorry, I'm just not an adulterous person, I think ;) OR at least...I'm not as bad as SOMEONE. Wow, I really should not be trying to justify anything at this moment, so I'll just stop myself before I bitch like crazy.

So, I just kind of wanna write about Pastor Mark's Message:

The story of David's adulterous heart, was a story about "sexuality, murder, and pride gone wrong". Many times in lives, we like to take things in our own hands, because we do not believe that God wants the best for us - and THAT is behind quite alot of the sin in our lives. Many times, when we are living in darkness - we DO NOT want God to see us, though we know that he always does. The fact that he always watches us, results in us IGNORING him, and that truly kills our souls. "David allowed his soul to spiritually drift, he toyed with temptation and sin, he tried to cover up [his sins], and he ignored [God]". Many of the times, when we do things that we know will hurt the ones we love, it doesn't have to be adultery, it can be other things. We need to think, HOW ARE WE GOING TO LOOK INTO THE EYES OF THE PEOPLE WE LOVE, HOW CAN YOU, AND WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO?

Done talking about that message, it really did have a huge impact on me; just made me think of my eating disorder, and um...something else. We went to lunch at Pizza Hut, fat fat...more fat? BAHAHAs. When we got home, I forced myself to exercise for a half hour, in hopes of burning what I had just eaten. Then, off to chinese church, where I had to perform, ugghs, embarassing? I got a text message (I will go into more detail later!), I couldn't quite believe it, but whatever. Then, we got home, and I had an orange & cereal, more about my food intake later.

ABOUT THE TEXT MESSAGE: _______ did something she had sworn she'd never do last night. She was drunk, she made a mistake, it deserves to be forgiven. I'm not the one who would be mad at her, but she's mad at herself, I wonder if she can forgive herself for what she has done. I don't know all the details, but I know that I really do disapprove of what she did, SORRY, you know I do. I won't judge her about it though, as it was a mistake.

That made me think about what Mr. Lloyd had said a couple weeks ago; our society these days, lets so many people off because it's all just a "mistake". When someone kills someone, it's all a mistake. Sure, they pay for it, with what? A couple years in Jail? Sometimes, people plead with insanity, and where do they end up? A MENTAL HOSPITAL, not even prison. As you've probably figured, the death penalty does not exist in British Columbia. A man got away with murdering his wife, because he was going mental. He had apparantly lost his job, and really just couldn't figure out how to go on living...so, he kills his wife. I'm sorry, but WHAT THE HELL. Really? SERIOUSLY? It's not that hard to find a job, just get a low paying one if you really find it that hard. THOSE ARE NOT HARD TO COME BY. Losing your job, does NOT justify you killing your wife. I just think that: we all make mistakes, that's true; but when is it that the person DOES NOT deserve to be forgiven? I KNOW that the Bible says that we are to forgive everyone, but really, certain things just CAN'T BE FORGIVEN. Some things...PEOPLE DON'T DESERVE TO GET AWAY WITH. YOU TAKE SOMEONES LIFE, yours deserves to be taken as well? I don't know, I could go ON AND ON about this topic, but I'll stop.

INTAKE TODAY

Little bits of food @ Pizza hut - approx. 250? calories

Orange - 59 calories

Special K cereal (a bit more than usual) - 200 calories

Another Orange - 59 calories

Thinsations - 100 calories

OUTAKE

30 mins of skipping rope - 200 calories BURNED

hopefully doing more exercise later, but i may have shin splints. UGH.

=468 Calories, EW EW EW.

oh & if i haven't responded to anyone's text messages, I'm TERRIBLY sorry. I kind of got sick of responding to them, but i read them! :) I tried to respond to them today, but I don't think I got everyone.

anyway, back to school tommorow. YAY, time for fake smiles & fake happiness. ohgosh!

LOVES, joannaseow.